Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Just take what life throws at you!

Well I have had an eventful couple of weeks, some good things happened and some very annoying things have happened!

The first thing that I suppose has effected a lot of my issues, is the fact that I fractured a bone in my foot during class four weeks ago now. I couldn't believe that I had done it! I have never broken a bone in my life and now when I need my feet for work I go ahead and do that!!! Angry and foolish are the first two words that spring to mind!

So after been issued with my Moon Boot (that's what the Scene One students called it) I thought at least I'm not in cast, it could be worse, the only thing I couldn't do was drive! As a result of not being able to drive I haven't made any of my Cultural NL classes for four weeks and I am truly starting to miss all the students that I teach there and it makes me realise how lucky I am to have a job that I truly love and enjoy going to every week.

I have been.. sort of.... evaluating my life ever since I had this moon boot placed, ever so painfully, on my foot. I don't know if it is because I have had time to sit and think but I definitely have been thinking.... a lot!
I know I have said before that I do want to be actress and I do want to pursue that dream until it happens but part of me thinks that I need to be practical........I can't give my children (when they come) everything I want them to have not having the security and the knowledge that my job makes enough for what they need. This conflicting feeling has been bouncing around inside my head ever since we moved into our house. It made me think that I am no longer one person, I now part of my own family. I need to provide for myself and for Paul so that we can achieve everything we want in life. It does sound rather deep but it is true.

On a great day out, One of my longest and dearest friends gave me reassurance that these feelings were ok and that everyone of her friends are feeling the same. She said something really obvious that made me feel instantly better, she said that everyone is searching for that perfect vocation that gives them the amount of money needed to provide for their family but also fulfils their dreams in life. She also never tells me a lie and always helps me make the right decisions (so I know it is right thing to do) As we sat in the bean scene eating our lunch I realised that being a teacher and a performer is the right way for me to go. Its the best of both worlds, I get to pass my passion and knowledge onto people who respect it and also satisfy my creative mind.

This is when my NEW dream was born, I want to become a drama teacher within secondary schools.
It is something I have toyed with for a while but I now realised it is MY perfect vocation. The tough part is obviously going to be getting back into University and not just any University, Edinburgh University.

It will be a challenge but hopefully will all the support around me I'll make it come true.

Tuesday, August 13, 2013


As everyone knows I really want to be an actor, so for that to work I need an agent........

So the fact that I don't have one has been playing on my mind for about four years and I have desperately tried to get one but one question always arises when I am talking to a representative

"What was your first professional job?"

Which I then reply after a sigh "I haven't had one yet"

which leaves them on the phone thinking this girl is wasting her time here just give up and go and get a crappy normal job like everyone else, oh wait a minute I already have that ( words Green and saving you money everyday covers that)

How do they expect you to have professional experience if you don't  have an agent????
Most castings are closed ones and extremely difficult to get so I am at a complete loss.

Why can't you just have talent and passion???? I believe I have both of those things with a massive measure of enthusiasm thrown in. Deflated, one word for how I feel about this.

To help my situation I have signed up to Casting Call Pro something I thought I wouldn't have been able to get since I didn't go to a "Registered Drama School"  but to my surprise it accepted my application, I will use this for a month and see if it at least gets me a show reel. Right now I don't really want money I just want experience and the chance to perform and find my true self again.

This industry just frustrates me, half the people in it are talentless and just there because of luck and chance. I don't want to leave my career up to chance, I am going to take control. I don't care if the only thing I get out of this is a chorus member in crap local pantomime or a walk on part in a film or a TV programme at least if I get that I can say I was a professional actor.

Sunday, June 30, 2013

Maybe I will start to write a blog....

Hello Everyone,

I have been thinking for a while that I would continue writing my blog that I started 3 years ago when I headed off on my my amazing adventure to NYC.

So much has happened in the three years since. I have bought my own house, I am getting married, I am now teaching wonderful children, I have joined forces with a dear friend and created a great theatre school called Scene One Theatre Arts and I have performed in great shows.

Speaking to my BFF Katie tonight made me think about taking up the blog again. I sometimes get caught up in other peoples lives and achievements that I don't reflect on my own. I don't look at the amazing things I am doing and just focus on the goals I haven't achieved yet. So I think by writing this will make me realise that events happen for a reason and my dreams will come to me in time and I should just appreciate what I have at this moment in time and most importantly be proud.

I have decided tonight that I am going to have a singing lesson every month to get back into the mind set of a performer and also to get my passion back. I have been so focused on my wonderful students that I have thought about my own performing efforts. So I will phone my great singing teacher tomorrow and set up that all important first lesson back!

Jen x

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Leaving NYC

10th July

Well right now I am sitting in Newark airport waiting to board the plane that is taking me home! Yesterday I had a lot of mixed emotions part of me wanted to stay because I have met amazing and talented people here but the other part just wants to see my family and Paul. We had some final assessements in our classes and the commerical one was a little difficult. We had to do this toothpaste commerical and read it off of a cue card I think I did ok but I dont think I would have booked the commerical. In acting we had to do our scene, I don't think Carol like us much that time. I just got a feeling that she thought the scene was stale and boring but I did everything she asked of me and hopefully it changed my performance. After lunch we had movement and we had to do our final viewpoint session. I love doing these and I find it such a rewarding experience. We then had voice and had to perform our mr suess poem and our romeo and juliet scene. Im so shocked I got through the grip top sock poem because for the whole of thursday night it just wouldnt stay in my head! it very annoying but it came out better than I expected and I suprised myself with it. After class we headed down for the harbour cruise! the cruise was good but I just kept thinking noooo! after this I have to say goodbye to people. So we were on the subway going back to the dorms and victor had to get off at a different stop because he doesnt stay in the dorms so we all say goodbye then he jumps off the train! I just felt devasted! it was such a horrible feeling! We get back to the dorms and Liza is all packed up ready to go! and I was like I cant deal with this! but she wasnt leaving until 4am so I decided to start packing then have some sleep and walk with her and Cassy round to subway. I wish I hadnt done this! I really hate saying goodbye! The tears had started and I couldnt stop them. So we headed back to the dorms and went for a small amount of sleep before I woke up and told more people from my room goodbye! I was getting better I tried cry this time so I managed to pull it together! I went up and finished packing up the room and cleaned the bathroom. Me and alton were leaving at 12pm for the airport because we were taking the train to Newark so Im doing in lobby with all my stuff and now I have to say goodbye to maria, matt and mimi. I had got the subway every morning with these people and mimi was the first person I met here. It was super tough, Mimi just brust into tears and I couldnt hold it in anymore! I couldnt believe that in the short space of a month I had grown so attached to these people and I am truly going miss every single one of them!
This experience has been truly amazing, I have met new friends that I know I will keep in touch with. I know that within this short month my skills have improved and changed for the better and I am still suprised that I managed to live in New York for a month! That is an achievement in itself! Well I better hurry up and finish this because my battery is going to run out!
Goodbye New York City! You truly are a delicious apple!
Thank you to everyone who has helped me on my journey! I will never forget any of you!
Thanks to everyone who had read my story! I hope you enjoyed it!

Good luck everyone!


Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Last Week of Class!

Tuesday 6th and Wednesday 7th July

As I woke up on Tuesday I realised that this was my last Tuesday in New York City and that this time next I would at home and have started back at work. That fact truly depressed me!
Anyway Cassy slept in our room last night because her air conditioner was broken and it was a very hot night! Walking to class from the subway I realised that it felt very hot and there is usually a change of temperature from down in the subway to up in street but that morning there was no difference.
To start our day we had improvisaition. We didnt get to play our usual came of whoosh! which I was extermley dissappointed about but we started off with a new thing. Three people went up, one was the person in the shop and the other two were customers. We were given what kind of shop it was then we did a scene. We had to do it again the exact same way but this time with a different emotion. It was rather interesting because we got given haunted so that was rather funny! We then headed to our next class which was film and Tv basics. This class we got to film a soap opera scene that our teacher had wrote. The scene was just basically making fun of soap operas with all the regularly cliches! So was a camera man! which was exciting! I got to zoom in and everything! so once we had filmed that Todd went onto give us words of advice and gave us a system on how we can be successful!
When I went outside for lunch was soooo hot that I walked just one block and I was sweating a ridiclous amount! We then checked the interent and it was 102 degrees! I was like thank god for air conditioning We had stage combat after lunch! and we just came up with a new fight with a different partner. My partner wasnt feeling very well so we didnt do it full out which was a little gutting but it couldnt be helped! Then onto voice and we started work on shakespeare!
Once we got back to the dorms I got changed and headed off the the gym! I felt so much better afterwards!
Today we started off with commerical class, we had to work on this toothpaste script which was interesting and very wordy but I think everyone got it in the end! It was then onto acting which I was dreading because I really didnt want our scene to get ripped apart so we get up and our teacher wanted us to improv the first part before we started our lines. So Im doing it and then I find myself that Im crying, it was really strange! and then the scene just came out much easier. Our teacher really liked our work and said that my why and fact sheet for my character was excellant! so after it I felt much better and relieved that she liked it!
After lunch we headed to movement to practice our viewpoints for our test on friday. So it was good just to practice before we get graded on friday. We then moved onto voice and worked more on language in shakespeare. Tonight I just headed to the gym and watched some tv!
so I only have three days left here and that does make me sad but I am ready to come home!
Speak to you all soon!


Last Weekend in NYC!

Hello everyone!,
well here I am writing up the events of my last weekend in the awesome place that is the big apple!
Saturday was when I was determinded to see West Side Story! so I got up after having a very long lie in and made my way into manhattan! I just went straight to the theatre and got a ticket for $45 so I was happy and really looking forward to the show! I then came back to the dorms and got ready and then me and Sasha headed out for the show! Sasha was determinded she was a McDonalds so we went to the one in Times Square. I felt proper american after eating it and slightly fatter! It funny because when we were eating there was a guy asleep at the table next to us but he was dressed up as Micheal Jackson and I all I could think was he isnt dead he is just taking a nap in McDonalds!
We go to the theatre and climbing hundreds of stairs to get to our seat! it was really high up and steep so I didnt really like peering over the egde! but you could see everything on the stage so I wasnt bothered at all! The dancing in the show was amazing! it was very much like the film and used moves form it. I thought that guy that played tony had an amazing voice! he sang with no effort! I did like the Maria but I do think she could have acted a little better and spoke louder! even with a mic I could hardly hear her! But when the whole cast came together in the gym hall scene, which is my favourite, it was electric! the stage just came alive!
This show is definitly one of my favourite musicals in the classic catergory! I could see a lot of stage combat in the rumble and I was like I can do that! and that!
After the show I just came back to the dorms and watched a film on tv and headed to bed!
On sunday it was 4th of july so not a lot of things were open but I didnt really have any plans but me and Liza decided to go to Forever 21 and do some shopping! I freaking love that shop! I think we spent about two hours in there! then we just headed home! we went down the promenade to watch the fireworks but it turns out they were on the other side of the island so we couldnt see them! I was gutted! I was like noooooooo! Ive never experienced indepenance day before!
After that I just went back to the room and went to sleep! it was so hot over the weekend and it just seemed to knock the life out of me!
On monday me, mimi and cassy headed to Coney Island! This time is was quiet and we could get right down the beach this time! I felt that it was much hotter so I was suffereing a little bit! After spending some time there we headed back. We made a stop at bath and body works so I could pick a present! We had Monday off school because it was a holiday weekend! It felt really strange because I kept thinking that the Tuesday was a Monday totally confused me!
So that was my last weekend in NYC! I am gutted that I will be going home and leaving this amazing city behind but I am looking forward to coming back to normal things like food I know, Money I know and most importantly my bed! The one I have here is very uncomfortable! Just cant wait to see some familar and loving faces!
Speak to you all soon!

Saturday, July 3, 2010

The rest of the third week

Wednesday, Thursday and Friday

Hello everyone sorry I havent written the last part of the week up Ive been a tad busy!
Ok so Wednesday came around and we started off with improvisation class. We started with the usual came of whoosh! and then moved on scenes! In the scenes we had to establish the where and make it come alive! This was a little challenging but we all managed it! It was then onto film and tv basics where filmed the last scene! and then Todd taught us about voice overs! this was really fun to do because we were doing examples from the radio! The first one was for a telephone company and the second one was for chocolate covered cheesecake bites! it was really funny to do and I tried out my american accent and Todd really like it so that was a bonus!
After lunch we had stage combat and this time we put together a combination of the moves we had learned to make up a fight scene! it was soooo much fun. My partner was victor and we came up with an amazing fight! it was acctually really hard work and I was proper tried after it but it was so much fun! Stage combat is defo one of my favourite classes! We then had voice class, we did our usual warm up and we then had to present our voice poems to the class. I had chosen a red red rose by Robert Burns. When I said the poem I was fine and then Sarah said have you got someone in mind and I said yes and then she said where are they and when I went to answer her I started to cry! it was really bizarre I didnt go up there to cry but when I thought about how long it was until I had been home and seen paul and my family I just got so emotional! Sarah wanted me to say the poem again with thinking about this person in mind so I did it but it was struggle and then she wanted me to say Ill be home soon! I never thought I would be able to cry like that but I did and now I know that if I need to cry I can! I felt like I had achieved something in that class and I felt proud of myself!
Thursday started off with commerical class and it was about tasting food and conveying the taste on camera! it was acctually quite hard but I managed it even though it took me about 4 trys! we had to pretend that we were eating chicken wings and our line was wow it tastes great! it was a bit cheesy but it was good fun! we then moved on to acting class and we had to present our scenes to Carol, we were all dreading this because the homework she had give us was so hard! I brought all my props but we ran out of time so we didnt get to do our scene! after lunch we had movement and we were just exploring the view points more and doing more group improvisations which are a litte confusing but are fun! Our last class was voice and we just watched the rest of the voice poems. On thursday night I had to read over a list of film terms for our taste on friday.
So improvisation on friday was a little difficult because we had to talk in jibberish in different accents, italian, japanese, swedish and french! I was kinda rubbish at this but I managed to get through it. In film and tv basics we get our test and realised that it is a joke and all the answers didnt really make sense! it was a little annoying because I read over all the terms! we then watched one flew over the coocoos nest! I had seen it before it was really good but a tad messed up! After lunch we had stage combat and we leanred how to roll then pull out a gun and shot! it was really fun because at the end flick our hair which was by far my favourite bit! then we learned how to throw someone into an object! This class sounds sinister but it so much fun!
We then headed to voice to find that we had to lead our own warm up which was interesting to see what I could remember and what I found most useful. Sarah then told us that we were going to Union square park to do poems which was a little daunting because the park was really busy and people were stopping to listen! Once class was over we all headed back to the dorms. Me mimi and cassy went out for dinner and we went to a place called five guys its a fast food shop with burgers and to be fair it was the best burger I have ever had in my life! then me and mimi got ready to out for drinks! Having a few drinks with people from my group was really nice!
Well its saturday and tonight Im heading out to see west side story! I'm really excited it should be a really good show!
well I better go and get ready!
speak to you all soon!